It happens to all of us. Sometimes we get over it easily, sometimes we don’t.
The tricky thing is: the bigger or better the things are at stake, the fear of not being good enough always gets bigger too. We may even decide it’s safer to just stay put. (or is it?)
Picture these two scenarios with me.
Sarah was at a new product meeting at work with senior management, all of a sudden, she got an edgy but really cool idea that may change the game of marketing for this product. She wanted to say something when her boss looked at her. But within seconds, she swallowed that thought.
Joey has been dancing at a local Salsa social club for 9 months and there was an audition for a performance at the end of the year. Some of his friends were going for the tryout. He would love to do it but he kept putting it off to even sign up for the audition.
Well, should they go for it?
You may say, it depends on how good was Sarah’s idea or Joey’s dancing skills. Right?
Well, hmmm. Nope.
None of that really matters.
They were both afraid to fail or being judged as “not good enough” so they prefer not even try.
But here is the thing. If they actually give themselves the chance to try, they may succeed or at the very least win by having the courage.
The next time when something comes up, it will be less threatening and they may go for it again. So you see, it is almost like some form of mental practice.
Finding Courage and Being Vulnerable
You may think it is our thinking or worrying that get in the way.
But in fact, it was the FEELING of what If no one else approves or validates or believes or trusts or … even likes me… that get in the way.
We don’t like that feeling of not good enough, and we think/talk ourselves out of the risk of having that feeling.
But what if I tell you that it’s Sarah’s dream to advance to a management position, she needs to show others that she is creative and innovative, exactly what the company needs and her boss knows that too.
As for Joey, he is actually really good in Salsa, people at the club were already noticing that and by the way, his future wife would land a spot at the same performance team and that’s how they would meet … IF HE WENT FOR IT ….
Now, aren’t you going to say, OMG, in that case, go for it, Sarah and Joey!!!
That’s why I’d say, sometimes, our feelings are overrated
What I mean is this:
- Feelings may not be true, it may just be self-doubt and worry that have no evidence to back up
- How we feel can be affected by many things, including factors like: did you have adequate sleep last night? Do you exercise regularly or have good nutrition in your body?
- We need to get over ourselves, it is not always about YOU, look at the bigger picture and focus on how you may serve or contribute or impact others for a greater good.
- Sometimes it is about YOU, but daring to try and to face our fear is what set you apart. It takes courage, which is not easy to come by.
If you would like a more successful and inspiring life, it is super important to cultivate a mindset that is not fixated but focus on growth and possibilities.
It may feel challenging, uncomfortable and frightening but if we instinctively know there is something we must do in order to achieve our goals or dream, then we must give ourselves the chance.
Don’t be the person who stands in your way to achieve greatness.
What is the 1 thing you keep on avoiding, procrastinating or ignoring, but you know deep down it is actually something really good for you to Just Do it?
When you decide to face your fear, you win.
When you decide to believe in your self-worth, you win.
When you decide to trust your instinct and stop letting your thoughts to talk you out of doing something good for you, you win.
When we allow ourselves to face our vulnerability, that is when we will find our courage.
Do you have a story about the fear of not being enough? Share with me in the comments below or e-mail me at firstname.lastname@example.org.
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